Love on the Brain
by EyexLinerxWhore
Summary: All I ever did was love you. Why wasn't that enough? (Part 1 in a series following "Blue")


_So, this was spawned from having a lot of personal unresolved feelings, being stuck writing on my Enzo story and being back in the saddle with loving the hell out of Baron Corbin. This is very very very loosely inspired by Rihanna's song Love on the Brain. Italics are a flashback._

* * *

 **Love on the Brain**

Two years. It had been two years since she had seen that name. Two years since she had seen that address. The handwriting on the cream colored envelope was distinctively feminine and definitely not his handwriting. Upon opening the envelope, her heart felt like it dropped down into her stomach.

A wedding invitation.

Her first instinct was to walk over to her stove and burn it, but she tossed the envelope on the table with the rest of her junk mail and mentally debated with herself over sending an RSVP.

For weeks, the envelope sat on her kitchen table mocking her. Still not able to make a decision, she picked up her phone and decided to call the one person that might be able to talk some sense into her and the situation.

"Long time no speak." Was the greeting when he answered her call.

"You're one to talk, Graves."

"I'm a busy man. What's going on, kiddo?"

"Corey, you're 4 years older than me, pipe down."

He chuckled, "Well, you called instead of sending a text so it must be important. What's up?"

"Why didn't you tell me Tom was getting married?"

"I didn't think it was my place. Why do you ask?"

She grabbed the offending envelope, cradling her phone between her ear and shoulder, as she pulled the cliche black and white photo invitation out, "I got an invitation."

"You what?" The shock in his voice was evident.

"Yeah. I'm not sure why, but I definitely got an invitation."

"Are you gonna go?"

"I was hoping you could," she paused briefly, "help me decide somehow."

"You want me to tell you whether or not you should attend your ex-boyfriend's wedding?"

"Yeah. Kinda. You're always my voice of reason."

"No."

"No?"

"No, I don't think you should go."

"Why not?"

"It'll just stir shit up. It'll be a shit show."

She chuckled warily, "Well maybe this is my way of saying goodbye."

"It's a wedding, not a funeral."

"I know. But maybe if I see him marrying someone else, I can move on and stop loving him."

She was crying. He hated that sound. He had only witnessed it in person a few times and every time it felt like he was being physically hurt.

"I've tried everything, Matt."

And she was very serious when she used his real name.

"And maybe seeing him literally devote his life to someone will make something click in my mind that there's no way I could I ever have him back."

* * *

Never in a million years did she think she'd be walking into a huge Catholic Church to watch her ex marry someone else. After her talk with Corey, he urged her not to go. They had stayed on the phone for nearly two hours going back and forth, but by the end of the conversation she was still eying the stupid invitation.

A few days later and a half of bottle of Patron gone, she hit fuck it. She was going to the wedding. And it was probably going to be one of the biggest mistakes of her life; all in an attempt to fix herself.

* * *

"What the hell is going on with you? I've never seen you fidget this much in our entire friendship." Corey chuckled.

Baron glared at him, "I'm getting married."

"Yeah, that's why we're here."

"I'm getting married." He muttered to himself as he started pacing.

Corey watched him intently, "Are you about cry or throw up or something?"

"Should I feel that way?" He pulled at the hem of his jacket for what seemed like hundredth time.

"Everyone's different. Dude, relax. You love her don't you?"

He stopped pacing. His face resembling that of a deer in headlights.

"What?"

"Yeah. I love her. I think. I don't know. This is the rest of my life, man."

"Trust me, I know. I'm married with 3 kids, but I wouldn't have it any other of way."

"You never doubted your decision?"

"Nah. Things weren't and still aren't smooth sailing all the time, but she's stuck with me through thick and thin, even before we were married."

Baron ran his hands up his face and over his hair that was hanging loose.

"Are you getting cold feet?"

"She'd have my balls if I ruined this." He pulled his hair into a low bun at the nape of his neck.

Corey frowned, "What? Dude, who the hell are you marrying?" He chuckled warily.

Baron shook his head and went back to pacing.

"Will you please sit down somewhere?" Corey chuckled.

He had to get out of there. He needed some fresh air.

"I need some air." He walked out before Corey could respond.

* * *

He'd found a quiet secluded area with a bench and a ton of rose bushes. He pulled the hair tie out of his hair and ran his hand through his hair.

This was supposed to be one of the best days of his life. His heart had been in his throat for months, but not because of this very special and important day. He saw her name on the RSVP list. He hadn't had anything to do with the actual sending out of invitations. He had just handed his phone over to his fiancée and told her to send the invitations to whomever she thought would show up.

Now he was ready to vomit at the thought of seeing her again for the first time in over two years. They never had time for each other. She had two jobs. He was traveling more with NXT. When they were together they were fighting, hate fucking each other or sleeping. They would be good for a few days and the cycle would repeat itself. He was tired and his patience was wearing thin. He wanted more and he found it with the woman he was marrying, but not at the expense of breaking his ex's heart.

 _She was sitting on his couch waiting for him to finish getting ready so they could have their first day date in a long time. His phone kept vibrating on the table. She leaned forward to grab the device to take it to him when she noticed the messages._

 _"Who's Alessia?" She spoke as soon as he entered the living room._

 _"What?" He stopped walking being caught off guard._

 _"Who. The. Fuck. Is. Alessia?" She annunciated clearly and calmly._

 _"Why are you asking me?" He deflected._

 _"Because, you left your phone on the coffee table and she's blowing your shit up."_

 _ **'Fuck.'** He internally groaned._

 _"She misses you and can't wait to see you tonight."_

 ** _'Fuck. Fuck.'_**

 _"Are you going through my phone?" He walked over to the back of the couch._

 _"No, Thomas. It's right here on the fucking lock screen." She stood up rounding the couch to face him._

 _He closed his eyes taking in a deep breath, "Look, I..."_

 _"No, you don't need to explain. I'm not stupid. Or maybe I am. I'm not sure."_

 _"You're not. Don't say that."_

 _"Stop. Just... Stop. How long?"_

 _"A couple of months."_

 _"Tommy..." She felt like the air had just been knocked out of her._

 _"Things have been so fucking shitty between us. I wanted something more than just fucking and fighting."_

 _"More than me fucking loving you and it not ever being enough?"_

 _He stood there quietly and eerily still._

 _"I just wanted to know that you loved me too; that you weren't just saying it to me because I was saying it to you. I wanted you to mean it. And when you didn't or couldn't or wouldn't, I pulled away. I started working more because how do you recover from spilling your soul to the one person that matters the most just to have them stare at you blankly? I should've left then, but like I said, I'm stupid. I couldn't get enough no matter how shitty the situation. And now I'm paying the fucking price." She harshly wiped away her tears._

 _He reached out to wipe her tears away but she turned her head away. She gathered her things as his phone vibrated again on the coffee table._

 _She smiled an unhappy smile nodding her head as she opened the door and left his house. All he could do was stand there and watch her go._

After searching for a little bit, Corey and Baron's brother finally found him.

"You ready to do this?" Both men asked him in unison.

He didn't speak, but stood, put his hair back in a bun and left the area he had been sitting in.

She was late. On purpose, of course. She decided, while sitting in her car, she could sneak in and sit in the back. That was tactless of her, she knew, but there wasn't enough alcohol in the world to prepare her for the day.

She hadn't missed the bridal procession, but Baron was already at the alter waiting for his bride. That was a tough pill to swallow. She wasn't good enough for him and by way of cheating on her, he found someone to marry. Her eyes welled up at her thoughts.

As the wedding began, the more and more her thoughts about this being a bad idea came rushing to the surface. She was going to be sick. She couldn't sit there and watch him marry someone else. They were about to exchange vows and rings, but she needed out.

"Excuse me." She spoke quietly to the people in her pew. She started side stepping her way to the aisle when he turned to get the ring from his brother. He saw something move out of the corner of his eye. He looked to the back of the church and realized it was her.

She had been caught. And instead of running the hell out of there like she wanted to, she stood there staring at him, tears threatening to spill. She was in a church, she could hope to God that he couldn't see that far, right?

He kept staring. She looked good as she always did. She was wearing all black as per usual, but as always looked stylish and classy. He swallowed hard. He couldn't take his eyes off of her and she seemed to be stuck where she was standing.

"Tom, dude. What are you doing?" His brother muttered, but Baron didn't respond. He was frozen too.

Their family and friends were starting to notice this too. It seemed like suddenly everyone was aware there was something going on and the church was filled with harsh whispers and mumbling.

"Don't embarrass me on my wedding day, Thomas." Alessia spoke turning his face towards her. He looked down at her brown eyes and suddenly wished they were the "whiskey in the sunlight" hazel eyes he had grown so fond of a few years ago.

He turned slightly to look to the back of the church, but she was gone.

* * *

 _Unresolved feelings, remember? Harsh reality is, sometimes you don't get the closure you need. Well, my reality anyway. Hope you guys enjoyed. Leave a review if you want. And as always, thanks for reading.  
_


End file.
